im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
