Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Farmville is her only friend.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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