awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize