I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
