Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
