There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
