Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Randomize
