Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
