Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
