Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
