We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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