i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
someone threw a dead crab at me
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
PANTIES FOUND
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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