If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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