There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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