i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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