I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize