Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
