i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Let's paint friendship bongs
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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