she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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