I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize