the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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