Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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