so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
