69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize