i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
