it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize