oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
did i walk over a car last night?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
