This dress was meant to end up on your floor
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
