This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
