Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
