I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
These tits shall not be calmed
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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