You work out of a Hotel?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize