On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
