so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
