i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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