dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
