Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
