Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Life without a bra equals bliss.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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