Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
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