I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
