Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
