Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
