i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
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