two words: eviction party
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
