Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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