This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize