the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
