when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
