So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
