Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Randomize
