So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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