weddingsv make me drug and hornr
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
